Chimper #453
Sakurai the Divine is the only prophet whose entire theology is based on a hardware malfunction. It happened in The Crystal Highlands of Armaria, where stray magic is a known occupational hazard for merchants. One minute, they were a respectable bamboo salesman in a shirt and tie, demonstrating their new "Displayoooor" sales-screen. The next, a stray enchantment hit it, and instead of growth charts, it began flashing images of lost socks and angry-looking vegetables. The crowd saw divine prophecy. Sakurai saw an opportunity. They now travel, gleefully interpreting the "will of the screen" for a modest fee. The scar on their face is from dodging a turnip thrown by a dissatisfied customer who was promised riches and got a picture of a puddle instead.
